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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
An old rich man buys hearing aids
A Kid calls the Help Desk
A blonde man filling up an application form
A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


Dealing with a juggler
Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
Getting into fights
Go on a hiking trip
A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast
Woman is on a bus


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#241 : Business one-liners 97

We all want progress, but if you,re on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive. - C.S. Lewis

We are often most in the dark when we are the most certain, and most enligthened when we are the most confused.

We don't have the time or money to do it right, but we,ll have time and money to do it over again.

We need either less corruption or more chance to participate in it.

We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.

We sometimes get all the information, but we refuse to get the message.

We,ll worry about that when we get there.

We,re making progress. Things are getting worse at a slower rate.

We,ve always done it that way!

Wet manure is slippery. - OSHA discovery





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