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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
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A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
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#5943 : Before you enter Heaven

Three couples were coming home from dinner one night in the same car. Unfortunately the car was in a horrible accident and they all died. When they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter said to them, "Before you may enter Heaven, you must tell me why you should be allowed in."

The first man went up to St. Peter and said, "I`ve been a good man my entire life. I read the Bible everyday and never take the Lord`s name in vain." St. Peter said, "True, but you are so in love with with money that you married a woman named Penny." And with that they were sent to hell.

The second man went up to St. Peter and said, "I`ve been a great guy all of my life, I go to church every Sunday, and I`ve read the entire Bible four times." St. Peter said, "True, but you love to drink so much that you married a woman named Sherrie." And with that they were sent to hell.

The third man, overhearing what had been said, looked at his wife and said, "Awww shit, we`re never gonna make this, come on Fannie, lets go




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