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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
An old rich man buys hearing aids
A Kid calls the Help Desk
A blonde man filling up an application form
A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


Dealing with a juggler
Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
Getting into fights
Go on a hiking trip
A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast
Woman is on a bus

Instruments

#3460 Violin Jokes 29 What,s the difference between a washing machine and a violist? Vibrato. ... #3459 Violin Jokes 28 What,s the difference between a seamstress and a violist? The seamstress tucks up the frills. ... #3458 Violin Jokes 22 Why do violists stand for long periods outside people,s houses? They can,t find the key and they don,t know when to come in. ... #3457 Viola Jokes 8 What,s the definiton of "perfect pitch?" Throwing a viola into a dumpster without hitting the rim. ... #3456 Violin Jokes 42 What,s the definition of a minor second? Two violists playing in unison. ... #3455 Violin Jokes 10 What do you do with a dead violist? Move him back a desk. ... #3454 Violin Jokes 48 How do you keep your violin from getting stolen? Put it in a viola case. ... #3453 Violin Jokes 46 "Haven,t I seen your face before?" a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant. "You have, Your Honor," the man answered hopefully. "I gave your son violin lessons last winter." "Ah, yes,"... #3452 Violin Jokes 44 Jacques Thibault, the violinist, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while in the greenroom after a concert. "There,s not much room on this page," he said. "What shall I write?" Another vio... #3451 Violin Jokes 43 A violinist says to his wife, "Oh, baby, I can play you just like my violin." His wife replies, "I,d rather have you play me like a harmonica!" ... #3450 Violin Jokes 1 Why should you never try to drive a roof nail with a violin? You might bend the nail. ... #3449 Violin Jokes 47 Why don,t viola players suffer from piles (h?morrhoids)? Because all the assholes are in the first violin section. ... #3448 Violin Jokes 19 How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can,t get up that high! ... #3447 Violin Jokes 49 How do you tell the difference between a violinist and a dog? The dog knows when to stop scratching. ... #3446 Violin Jokes 45 What,s the difference between a violin and a viola? There is no difference. The violin just looks smaller because the violinist,s head is so much bigger. ... 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5