 | #3099 Ponderings collection 29
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
... |
| #3098 Ponderings collection 28
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes froze the end of my nose.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Why is the word big so little and the word little so... |
| #3097 Ponderings collection 27
Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
I`m not cheap, but I am on special this week.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
Many people quit looking for work when ... |
| #3096 Ponderings collection 26
I couldn`t repair my brakes, so I made the horn louder.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
What happens if you get scared hal... |
| #3095 Ponderings collection 25
Mothers feed their babies with little tiny spoons and forks so what Chinese mothers use. Perhaps toothpicks?
People seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. What are they doing? C... |
| #3094 Ponderings collection 24
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
Don`t think that you`re thinking. If you think that you`re thinking you only think that you`re thinking.
When I erase a word with a pe... |
| #3072 Ponderings collection 02
If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?
If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and droppe... |
| #3071 Ponderings collection 01
Why isn`t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Why are cigarettes sold i... |
| #774 Deep Thoughts 17
Instead of having ,answers, on a math test, they should just call them ,impressions, and it you got a different ,impression, so what, can,t we all be brothers?
Probably to a shark about the funnies... |
| #773 Deep Thoughts 16
It,s not good to let any kid near a container that has a skull and crossbones on it, because there might be a skeleton costume inside and the kid could put it on and really scare you.
I can see why... |
| #772 Deep Thoughts 15
If the Vikings were around today, they would probably be amazed at how much glow-in-the-dark stuff we have, and how we take so much of it for granted. We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. ... |
| #771 Deep Thoughts 14
If you,re ever stuck in some thick undergrowth, in your underwear, don,t stop and think of what other words have ,under, in them, because that,s probably the first sign of jungle madness.
Sometimes... |
| #770 Deep Thoughts 13
Too bad there,s not such a thing as a golden skunk, because you,d probably be proud to be sprayed by one.
To me, truth is not some vague, foggy notion. Truth is real. And, at the same time, unreal.... |
| #769 Deep Thoughts 12
Martha says the interesting thing about fly fishing is that it,s two lives connected by a thin strand. Come on, Martha. Grow up.
The old pool shooter has won many a game in his life. But now it was... |
| #768 Deep Thoughts 11
It you,re a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it,s real embarrassing if someone tries to kill you.
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is ... |
