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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
An old rich man buys hearing aids
A Kid calls the Help Desk
A blonde man filling up an application form
A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


Dealing with a juggler
Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
Getting into fights
Go on a hiking trip
A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast
Woman is on a bus

Answer Machine

#1562 Answering machine message 185 (Pick up the phone and say:) This is Chris. I,m not here right now. Leave me a message. BEEP. (Then listen.) ... #1561 Answering machine message 184 All our answering machines are busy. Please hold. (Pause.) All our answering machines are... (CLICK) This is the answering machine of... ... #1560 Answering machine message 183 Thank you for calling the CSU Automated Hearing Test Line. Prepare for Test 1. Is this tone louder in your left ear or right ear? ... BEEP ... #1559 Answering machine message 182 Hello you have reached the Smith residence. All of our operators are busy. Your call will be processed in the order it was received. (Annoying music...) Due to a large volume of calls, all of our oper... #1558 Answering machine message 180 (Loud music, John shouting:) HI, THIS IS JOHN, LET ME TURN DOWN THE MUSIC. (Loud footsteps, music turned down, a door slams.) Hi, this is the answering machine at John,s home, he just rushed out the d... #1557 Answering machine message 179 Hello? (Pause. Roommate,s voice:) C,mon, Matt, we,re gonna be late! -- Hold on, there,s someone on the phone! Hello? -- C,mon, dude! -- Hello? Aaah, whatever... c0pyr|ghtah!aj0kesc0m BEEP... #1556 Answering machine message 178 (Long pause, sound of phone dropping, sleepy voice:) Argh! (Pause.) Hello... (Sound of phone dropping, then a yawn.) Sorry man... I,m a bit tired at the moment... (Long yawn.) I,m going back to sleep ... #1555 Answering machine message 177 Hello. (Pause.) Hello? (Pause.) Hello! (Pause.) No, it doesn,t look as if I,m in right now. Maybe you should leave a message at the beep or call me back later. BEEP. (Pause three seconds.) Just kiddin... #1554 Answering machine message 176 The party you dialed is not available. Your call is being diverted to an alternate number. Please stand by... (Ring...) The number you dialed must be dialed by your 0 operator. (Click, beep, dial tone... #1553 Answering machine message 175 Hello, you have reached 555-1234. Our voice mail system is currently experiencing difficulties, so at the tone, please type your message on the keypad using the appropriate letters, and press the poun... #1552 Answering machine message 174 (To annoy a friend record this as his message, and he will have keypad music as messages:) Hello, you have reached Dave. Please enter your four digit PIN at the tone. ... #1551 Answering machine message 173 (Fairly boring message:) This is John. I can,t come to the phone right now, but if you leave a message at the tone, I,ll return your call. (Now, re-record the message every morning. Frequent callers w... #1550 Answering machine message 172 Hi, you have reached Richard. I,m sorry, but my answering machine is out of order, so the voice you are hearing is actually me. ... #1549 Answering machine message 171 Please hang up now if you would want to speak to Johan. Otherwise, please stay on the line to leave him a message. ... #1548 Answering machine message 170 Please leave a tone after the message. ... 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18