 | #5928 A famous Hollywood director dies and reaches Heaven
A famous Hollywood director dies and reaches Heaven. At the proverbial gate, St. Peter meets him and explains that God would like the director to make one more movie.
The director grimaces, " But I... |
| #5927 guy walks into confession and admits
This other guy walks into confession and admits to the priest that he had engaged in oral sex. The priest being quite new at this confession business tells the man he doesn, know what type of pennance... |
| #5926 The vicar was walking along the street
The vicar was walking along the street when he saw a little girl playing with her little doggy. He went to speak to her.
"Hello little girl", he said, "do you know who I am?"
"Yes", she said, ... |
| #5925 Three very religious rabbis in black
Three very religious rabbis in black with long beards were playing golf. A guy named Mulhaney wanted to play golf and this was the only threesome in which he could play. So he joins the rabbis and pla... |
| #5924 After a preacher died and went to heaven
After a preacher died and went to heaven, he noticed that a New York cab driver had been awarded a higher place than he. "I don,t understand," he complained to Saint Peter. "I devoted my entire life t... |
| #5923 Irish Nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat
Two Irish Nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat. One nun says to the other "I heard that the occupants of this country eat dogs."
"Odd, her companion replied, "but if we shall live in America w... |
| #5922 their pastor to set a date for their wedding
A young couple met with their pastor to set a date for their wedding. When he asked whether they preferred a contemporary or a traditional service,they opted for the contemporary.
On the big day, a... |
| #5921 new priest at his first mass was so nervous
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I... |
| #5920 walking past the church one day
A man is walking past the church one day. He sees two alter boys with their penises stuck in the snow bank.
The man asked them, "Why do you have your penises in the snow bank?"
The boys quickl... |
| #5919 sitting on a park bench one day
Three nuns were sitting on a park bench one day. A flasher walked up and showed them his stuff.
The first nun had a stroke.
The second nun had a stroke.
The third nun,s arm was too short. ... |
| #5917 The Ten Commandments
Different people look for different things in the Ten Commandments. Some are looking for divine guidance, some for a code of living, but most people are looking for loopholes... |
| #5916 A rabbi on a TV program mentioned
A rabbi on a TV program mentioned that he had compiled a list of four hundred sins. He received millions of requests for his list, mostly from people who wanted to find out what they were missing... |
| #5915 The night before Christmas
T,was the night before Christmas and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care.
They,d been worn all week and needed ... |
| #5914 Man is walking along a beach
This man is walking along a beach one day and finds an old lamp washed up on the shore. He takes it home and places it on the mantle, but doesn,t give much thought. A few weeks later he looks at it an... |
| #5913 Four ministers were playing golf one day
Four ministers were playing golf one day.
The group in front of them was extremely slow and as the day grew longer the ministers started to grumble. The delays got longer and the grumbling got loud... |
