 | #4737 the seasonally adjudted figure
Question: What is 1 + 2 ?
Politician: Well, if you look at the seasonally adjusted figures, you,ll find that it,s reasonably in line with government predictions.
Physicist: I won,t tell you unti... |
| #4736 the doctor initiated a conversation that went as follows:
A rather senile old lady went to her doctor complaining of draining and a feeling of fullness in her ear. After the examination, the doctor initiated a conversation that went as follows:
D: Why mad... |
| #4735 Whats the difference between
Whats the difference between a prostitute and a lawyer?
A prostitute stops screwing you after you,re dead.
... |
| #4733 An old man goes to his doctor for a physical
An old man goes to his doctor for a physical. The doctor says, "Take off all your clothes." So he does. Then the doctor says, "Now go look out that window." So he does. "Now stick out your tongue." So... |
| #4731 The speaker asked
A small business owner was giving a speech on the trials and tribulations of running a shop in today,s society. He summarized by simply saying "All lawyers are assholes"
At that, a man in the back ... |
| #4730 The doctor gives him another chance
There were three nuts in an asylum and they had been doing well in their therapy, so the doctors, committee decided it was time to give them a test, to see if they were ready to return to society.
... |
| #4728 McCarthy recovering nicely from an operation
McCarthy was recovering nicely from an operation, and he was happy except for his diet.
The meals were the same each day. For breakfast there was a glass of apple juice, one egg, one piece of toast... |
| #4727 Engineering Student
A young engineering student started working at a factory as vacation training. The foreman was a little busy so he handed the student a broom and asked him to sweep the floor.
The student began to... |
| #4724 They place animal informants throughout the forest
The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit... |
| #4723 A good start
What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?... |
| #4721 the doctor gives him another six months.
So the doctor tells the patient he,s got only six months to live.
But the patient doesn,t pay his bill on time, so the doctor gives him another six months.
... |
| #4720 There are skid marks before the skunk
What,s the difference between a dead lawyer in the road and a dead skunk in the road?
There are skid marks before the skunk
... |
| #4719 A man goes to a psychiatrist
A man goes to a psychiatrist. To start things off, the psychiatrist suggests they start with a Rorschach Test. He holds up the first picture and asks the man what he sees.
"A man and a woman making... |
| #4717 So a man calls the law firm of Shapiro
So a man calls the law firm of Shapiro, Shapiro, Shapiro & Shapiro.
He asks to speak with Mr. Shapiro.
"I,m sorry, but he,s in a meeting."
"OK," responds the caller. "Then let me talk with... |
| #4715 The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest
The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit... |
