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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
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A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


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Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
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A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
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Woman is on a bus


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#3215 : Chem one-liners 01

Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl. -- Mike Adams

Chemicals: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made.

Remember, if you`re not part of the solution, you`re part of the precipitate!

There is the joke about the homeopath who forgot to take his medicine and died of an overdose.

How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker?
None. That`s what organic chemists are for!

It is disconcerting to reflect on the number of students we have flunked in chemistry for not knowing what we later found to be untrue. --quoted in Robert L. Weber, Science With a Smile (1992)

Physical Chemistry is research on everything for which the negative logaritm is linear with 1/T -- D.L. Bunker

Q: What weapon can you make from the Chemicals Potassium, Nickel and Iron?
A: KNiFe.




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