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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
An old rich man buys hearing aids
A Kid calls the Help Desk
A blonde man filling up an application form
A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


Dealing with a juggler
Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
Getting into fights
Go on a hiking trip
A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast
Woman is on a bus


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#218 : Business one-liners 81

Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean they are not out to get you.

Just when you get going, someone injects a dose of reality with a large needle.

Just when you get really good at something, you don't need to do it anymore.

Just when you think you,ve won the rat race, along come faster rats.

Knowledge based on external evidence is unreliable.

Laziness is the mother of nine inventions out of ten.

Leakproof seals will.

Learn to be sincere. Even if you have to fake it.

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.

Leftover nuts never match leftover bolts.




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