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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
An old rich man buys hearing aids
A Kid calls the Help Desk
A blonde man filling up an application form
A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


Dealing with a juggler
Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
Getting into fights
Go on a hiking trip
A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast
Woman is on a bus


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#143 : Business one-liners 38

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

The elevator always comes after you have put down your bag.

The explanation of a disaster will be made by a stand-in.

The factory of the future will have only two employees, a man and a dog. The man will be there to feed the dog. The dog will be there to keep the man from touching the equipment.

The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.

The farther away the future is, the better it looks.

The faster the plane, the narrower the seats.

The first 90 percent of the task takes 90 percent of the time, the last 10 percent takes the other 90 percent.

The first myth of management is that it exists; the second myth of management is that success equals skill.

The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all of the parts.




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