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Customer to waiter
Why are you writing very slowly?
I have swallowed a key
An old rich man buys hearing aids
A Kid calls the Help Desk
A blonde man filling up an application form
A Blonde cuts sides of the capsule before taking it
This is the only way
A ship is sinking


Dealing with a juggler
Careful when you wish
Answering machine message 67
Getting into fights
Go on a hiking trip
A snail buys a fast new car
Boat troubles
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast
Woman is on a bus


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#141 : Business one-liners 36

The bigger they are, the harder they hit.

The book you spent $20.95 for today will come out in paperback tomorrow.

The business plan you prepare must be a lie; but it must be a detailed and precise lie rather than a vague and general lie.

The business world worships mediocrity. Officially, we revere free enterprise, initiative, and individuality. Unofficially, we fear it.

The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.

The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to...to...uhh...

The chance of a piece of bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

The chaos in the universe always increases.

The chief cause of problems is solutions.

The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.




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