 | #6713 Overheard on the elevator
Overheard on the elevator:
"Their marriage was going O.K. until they bought a water bed... then they started drifting apart."
... |
| #5798 looking all depressed
A guy walks into a bar, looking all depressed. He goes to the bar and orders a drink.
The bartender brings it to him and asks "Do you want to talk about something? You look kinda down in the dumps... |
| #5797 A Couple In A Traffic Violation
A cop pulls over a man for speeding and running a red light. The cop says "Do you know that you were speeding?"
The fellow says "No sir, I was not speeding."
Just then his wife leans over and sa... |
| #5796 A wife and her husband were having a dinner
A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for all the major status figures in Rome, Italy. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, sh... |
| #5794 the highest mountain
Man can climb the highest mountain, swim the widest ocean, fight the strongest tiger, but once he,s married mostly he takes out the garbage... |
| #5792 Cider?
During math class, one of the boys accidentally stabbed his hand with a compass.
When the teacher came over to see what the problem was, the boy asked for a glass of Cider.
The teacher looked at... |
| #5791 Two guys are talking over a beer
Two guys are talking over a beer when the first guy says "What,s wrong with you? You don,t look too good."
"Well my wife told me she would leave me next time I go golfing." said the second one.
... |
| #5789 A crusty old artillery colonel
A crusty old artillery colonel found himself at a gala event downtown hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom app... |
| #5787 At the funeral procession
A funeral procession was going down Murray Avenue in the front were two hearses, followed by a single man dressed in black, a large doberman pinscer, and then a motley procession of men. A fellow went... |
| #5786 the caveman, observed his mate running
Ug, the caveman, observed his mate running to him in tears, her leopard-skin skirt in disorder. "Ug," she cried, distraught, "do something quickly. A saber-toothed tiger has entered Mother,s cave. Do ... |
| #5785 Johnson came home unexpectedly from a business
Johnson came home unexpectedly from a business trip to find his wife in the arms of his best friend. He staggered back and said, "Max! I,m married to the lady so I HAVE to. But why you?"
... |
| #5784 Demonstrating once again
Demonstrating once again the importance of the lowly comma, this telegram was sent from a wife to her husband:
"NOT GETTING ANY, BETTER COME HOME AT ONCE."
... |
| #5783 A country girlhad just moved to the city
A country girlhad just moved to the city and was invited to a dance, but she couldn,t dance, so she asked a friend what she was going to do if someone asked her to dance. Her friend told her to tell t... |
| #5780 A man advertised for a wife in the papers
A man advertised for a wife in the papers. He got eighteen hundred replies from men who said he could have theirs... |
| #5779 honeymoon couple was spending
A honeymoon couple was spending their first night in bed. He grew very ardent and exclaimed rapturously in shrill tones, "I love you! I love you! I love you!"
She grew very passionate and pleaded e... |
