 | #595 Replacing lab rats with lawyers
The National Institute of Health (NIH) announced last week that they were going to start using lawyers instead of rats in their experiments. Naturally, the American Bar Association was outraged and fi... |
| #594 Here`s your fee schedule
A lawyer calls his client to tell him about his fee schedule.
"Alright," the lawyer says looking through his papers. "You owe me $1000 down and $417.58 cents each month for the next thirty-six mont... |
| #593 There are no honest lawyers
A lawyer named Impos Syble was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it.
"Here lies an honest man and a lawyer," re... |
| #592 What and who am I?
A snake and a rabbit were racing along a pair of intersecting forest pathways one day, when they collided at the intersection. They immediately began to argue with one another as to who was at fault f... |
| #591 The bronze statues
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco,s Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so... |
| #590 The devil`s offer
The devil visited a lawyer,s office and made him an offer. "I can arrange some things for you, " the devil said. "I,ll increase your income five-fold. Your partners will love you; your clients will re... |
| #589 Lawyers give irrelevant information
Two women are on a transcontinental balloon voyage. Their craft is engulfed in fog, their compass gone awry. Afraid of landing in the ocean, they drift for days. Suddenly, the clouds part to show a su... |
| #588 Lawyers take everything
A reporter outside of a courtroom asked a defendant clad only in a barrel: "Oh, I see your attorney lost the case!" The defendant answered, "No, we won."
... |
| #587 Solving a dispute
Two little squirrels were walking along in the forest. The first one spied a nut and cried out, "Oh, look! A nut!" The second squirrel jumped on it and said, "It?s my nut!"
The first squirrel said,... |
| #586 What type of tracks?
Two lawyers were out hunting when they came upon a couple of tracks. After close examination, the first lawyer declared them to be deer tracks. The second lawyer disagreed, insisting they must be elk ... |
| #585 Ounces of brain for sale
A man went to a brain store to get some brain to complete a study. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of professional brain offerred at this particular brain store. He begins to question the butc... |
| #584 Excess billing hours
A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. But, to his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came d... |
| #583 Rules for hunting lawyers
Washington state attorney season and bag limits
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1300.01 GENERAL
1. Any person with a valid Washington State hunt... |
| #582 That`s a real bargain
A Dublin lawyer died in poverty, and many people donated to a fund for his funeral. The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate a shilling. "Only a shilling?" said the Justice, "Only a shilli... |
| #581 Consultation fees
A lawyer,s dog, running around town unleashed, heads for a butcher shop and steals a roast. The butcher goes to the lawyer,s office and asks, "if a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my... |
